Hallmark Didn't Like My Card Ideas... maybe you will?

Roses are Red
Violets are blue
I f-d your sorority sister
Who’s the bad lay now?

My love for you
Is stonger than ever
But that restraining order
Makes seeing you naked a bit harder

Daisies are white.
Tulips are yellow.
Fuck the damn flowers
Let’s get naked.

I got you this present
It might make you cry
You thought I was yours
But I hooked up with your sister and now we’re moving in together with your parents.

Roses are red
Your eyes are so blue
You’ve kinda put one some pounds
And I think you belong in a zoo.

John Mayer once said
Your body is a wonderland
Yeah, well he was banging Jennifer Love Hewitt
And I’m stuck with a whiny chick from Othello.

Ain’t no mountain high enough
Aint no river wide enough
To keep you from bitching about me leaving the seat up.

Remember the day we met?
I saw you in the park.
We made out on the swingset
And watched the stars in the dark.
Remember the day right after that?
I walked you to your door.
Then walked downstairs to your neighbor’s place
And screwed her on the floor.

Happy Valentines Day