An open letter to pregnant Jamie

Dear Jamie Lynn Spears,

In case you haven't been reading the news, you're prego. My fellow man might like to call you a whore. I on the other hand will refrain. You're prego. That's all there is to it. You got sloppy one night and now you're dealing with it. Do I care? No, not really. Why the media have latched on to you and your fertilized egg is beyond me. Lord knows you'll probably make a better mom than your idiot sister.

I would like to point out that the book that your mother is writing is the biggest load of crap ever, however. Come on, a serious book about parenting? She's the one that cursed us with Brittany and all of the idiocrocy she shares with us via the tabloids everyday.

I guess what I'm saying is: hurry up, marry some sleaze we all know you'll divorce, poop out a child or two, make an ass out of yourself by shaving your head, and fall off into a life of obscurity. I don't care that you've got a bun in the oven. Please ask the media to stop talking about it--because I don't give a shit.

Regards,
Someone who could care less